I was going to rule the world

In my twenties, fresh out of college, visions of traveling, exploring people and ALL the THINGS, and making my mark on the world were at the top of my list.

My list of goals was endless and always evolving.

Goal-Check. Goal-Check. Goal-MET!

I was going to rule the world. I was going to do all the things

And I almost did…. but then I met you.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I clutched onto a small stick with two pink lines.

I bought a pink and a blue balloon and I went home to share the news with your dad.

I felt my heart ache with hope, joy, excitement, and fear about what life was going to be like now that you were in my world.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I went to my OB’s office and saw the beginning of your life on an ultrasound.

I listened to your heartbeat and cried at the sound, out of sheer bliss.

I placed my hand on my belly and spoke softly to you.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I bought onesies, blankets, and bottles.

I demanded your crib be put together six-months before your arrival.

I demanded the perfect wallpaper of light blue, ancient map scrolls, decorate the walls.

I demanded perfection for your arrival.

I started to get very sick all of the time, and anxiously awaited the presence of you in my arms.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead the doctors placed you on my Chest.

I smelled your beautiful head and kissed your perfect face.

I caressed your small hands and snuggled up your toes.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I traded sleep for endless nursing sessions.

I soaked up watching your beautiful eyelids shutter while you slept peacefully.

I worried about every food introduced, every milestone you met, and every person who held you in their arms.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I watched your learn to walk, talk, run and jump.

I read you endless stories and sang every lullaby I had ever learned.

I bathed you, I dressed you, I warmed you when you were cold, and snuggled you to keep you warm.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I gently coached you on how to listen.

I practiced teaching you how to follow directions.

I modeled saying please and thank you, to help you learn respect.

I was going to rule the world:

Instead I dropped you off at school.

I cried as I drove away and realized my baby was growing away from me, one day at a time.

I blew you a kiss and said I love you as you ran out the door to play with your friends.

I watched you grow into the most perfect human being I had ever known.

I was going to rule the world.

Instead I chose you.

You chose me.

I am forever grateful for your presence in this world.

I was going to rule the world.

Instead, I watched you become my world. And I wouldn’t dream of being anywhere else ever again.

-second mom club